Teenage Boys

Yes, I am an official failure at parenting. After punching several holes in our walls, I had to call in grandma and grandpa to take my boy home with them. How can you make a teenage boy understand that choices he makes now effect his future? How do you make a teenage boy feel empathy? How do you make a teenage boy respect others? How do you make a teenage boy want to succeed?
I have tried everything. His therapist even gave up on him. I am his mom and I will never give up on him. He is so much like his father it scares me to death,. I wish I could find a way to get through to him. He has so much potential. I hate to see him wind up in prision too.
So consider this a warning, if you need parenting advice, I'm definetely not your go to gal!